i completely forgot what i was going to say...

but oh well. finals are almost done. i just have to study for one more, write a 4-5 page paper, hope i passed everything, get through this day, and i'll be fine. i woke up feeling really depressed and i don't really know why. it kinda started last night until i got to drive the chevy truck because my car is in the shop. i'm glad small things like that satisfy me or i would never be happy. but i've been happy straight for a couple months now so obviously there will be down points. i wasn't even phased when i heard my grandpa died. and now my grandma here is in the hospital and isn't doing well so we'll see. anyway, i just have been thinking about him alot. and jacumba. i long for them both. hahaha. but seriosuly, that's all i've been thinking about. i just want to feel alive and they get me there. i'm going. sometime over break whether i'm alone or with someone, i'm going there. i can't wait. i really wish i could take off today but i can't....no car :( it's ok, means i get to drive the chevy truck again :) that was fricken fun. but yeah i really hope everything goes smoothly through my break. i don't want to deal with any shit but i think i already brought some upon myself, i just don't know it yet. oops. ok later.